I love the beach and the ocean. It’s always been a favored spot of mine. We haven’t been in a very, very long time. There was a time when we went, along with several other families, every October. It was an annual retreat to the Outer Banks. That has gone by the wayside now for a variety of different reasons, almost all of which point to a new season in our lives. I will have to find a new time and place to visit the ocean each year.

When I was a child one of my favorite things to do was to stand about knee deep or so and let the waves buffet me. I wanted to see how long I could stand before the outrushing tide swept the sand out from under my feet and I no longer had a foundation on which to plant myself. Could I curl my toes around enough sand to make a stand? Me against the elements! The horse she saith into the trumpets ha ha! And I played that game with myself for many long minutes, until the temptation of the waves and my brothers became too much and off we’d go to swim or build castles in the air or something equally delightful.

As an adult, I’ve tried this but it’s lost much of its charm. I’m stronger now and more adept. I can stand now in the face of all but the most outrageous waves. In fact, the waves that it takes to knock me down as an adult are really quite dangerous and I should not be standing out in them. The ocean holds other charms for me now.

I was reading through the blog-o-sphere this morning and came upon this at Bill Kinnon’s place:

One writer against Christmas went so far as to say that the shopkeepers for their own commercial purposes alone sustain Christmas Day. I am not sure whether he said that the shopkeepers invented Christmas Day. Perhaps he thought that the shopkeepers invented Christianity. It is a quaint picture, the secret conclave between the cheese-monger, the poulterer, and the toy-shop keeper, in order to draw up a theology that shall convert all Europe and sell some of their goods. Opponents of Christianity would believe anything except Christianity. That the shopkeepers make Christmas is about as conceivable as that the confectioners make children. It is about as sane as that milliners manufacture women.
— G. K. Chesterton, Illustrated London News, January 13, 1906.

Bill, in dry spot, was quoting the inimitable Chesterton. Fancy that. It kinda got me thinking though. I had a conversation yesterday with BlazingEwe about the nature of stuff and why we have so much. And why we think we have to have more. Why we like to shop, etc. We have these sorts of conversations regularly. Because we both know we have too much stuff and we feel assaulted by the messages to get more all the time. I commented on Bill’s post that shopkeepers might not have invented Christmas, but they surely feast upon it. Yes, they do.

This quote got me thinking about the ways in which we attempt to stand against the tide as adults. Chesterton is both pithily correct and yet, wrong. We’ve long known that in the aftermath of the Depression and WWII, the shopkeepers did get together and consciously (or perhaps not) decide on the path of planned obsolescence in order to create markets and economies and desires for their products in the masses. It’s a very symbiotic relationship and this did not happen overnight, nor was it done in a vacuum without the consent and knowledge of said masses. We may like to pretend we didn’t know, but we know. We’ve bought into it on some level.

So what have we done? Over the years, the decades, the generations, we’ve allowed the powers and principalities to tell us and we’ve told each other that the way to express our love for each other is to buy bigger and better gifts for each other. We’ve done this. No one else has. We can point to the manufacturers, the advertisers, the shopkeepers, etc. But in the end, we have met the enemy and he is us. Gifts keep getting bigger. Credit card debt gets deeper. The advertising gets gnarlier. First it was radios. Then it was televisions. Now it’s big screen televisions complete with play stations. Or complete kitchen makeovers. The giving is enormous. There is jewelry, clothing, automobiles. Using one’s credit cards will allow one to compete for prizes such as the perfect gift (that will cause the special someone to swoon). ( Lest you think I’ve been watching too much television, a good friend has been working retail this year and many of my examples come from her.)

Now before you think I’m a grinch (though I am 😀 ), I don’t have anything against gifts to express our love. I just wonder if we haven’t derailed a bit. I wonder if there isn’t some other way that we can express how we feel about our loved ones. I remember reading Little House in the Big Woods with LightGirl. And in that series Laura Ingalls Wilder revealed an entirely different cultural expectation for love and how it was expressed. It was seen over and over again, not just during their several Christmas celebrations, but during the thick and thin of their lives. And … no, I’m not advocating a return to the prairie. I’m just thinking about how they expressed themselves to one another. The gifts they gave each other were rarely physical. When they were, the gift had a special significance that revealed something about the recipient’s character or the relationship between the giver and recipient. The gifts revealed a level of thought and care that are rarely seen these days.

As I reflected on Bill’s GKC quote, the things that have been disturbing me about Christmas giving were put to rest. I’m relatively unconcerned about whether or not a gift is handmade. I don’t care about how much or how little is spent. I want to know that the giver spent time and care thinking about me. Just as I spend time and care thinking about the people that I give gifts to. Giving is akin to a spiritual ritual for me and I don’t enter into it lightly. It is one of the places where I continue to curl my toes into the sand and attempt to stand against the tide. I still can’t keep my feet. I get knocked around fairly regularly by the waves. But I keep getting back up and trying again. It feels just about as useless as standing against the ocean, but she saith into the trumpets … ha ha!

In an earlier post I was pondering the socio-economic system within which we live and how it forces us to make choices that go against the grain of our faith on many occasions. There is a rather large gap between how we are able to live and the standard set forth for us by Jesus. We all have choices that we make on a moment by moment basis for how each us might close that gap, but the truth of the matter is that we will never close it. Not in our current system. I’m not talking here about that abominable chasm illustrated insufferably by the Four Spiritual Laws. I’m simply sayin’ … with the way things are in capitalism, or socialism, or any other socio-economic system that we’ve got at the moment there is a tension between what we want to be able to do and the limits on what we are able to do. All of us make different choices with how we will live within those boundaries. Some of those choices seem nonsensical to others, illogical, even ironical at times.

In the comments of that post Patrick wrote deeply about the circle of giving and I wanted to quote him here:

Giving is a profound spiritual act of faith, not just in terms of money or tithing, but in what we have. If really done as a community then there is a sharing, a mutuality, in which it might not look terribly different except underneath the surface. Meaning someone who has money gives, say for good words written by someone who had to forsake pursuing money for a time to write them, or music by someone who ponders something deeply, or a service, or some other way of participating in the life of another.

If we are all giving then it seems like we are also receiving from each other, a circle, but not a circle in which we look out for ourselves but a circle in which we fall into the arms of each other trusting them for, maybe, even our daily bread. We empty what we have, and are filled by anothers emptying.

I love this image of the circle. That’s really beautiful and moves the conversation in a helpful direction. It’s a direction that talks about how we can both live within the system and close the gap that exists.  How we can begin to imagine living both in the world but not of it and bringing the Kingdom a little bit closer.

I was a little bit worried that some would see my post as a critique for any of us for participating in the system. We all do and we all must because we are in it. We cannot “get out of it”, we cannot excise ourselves from it as if we were teeth.  We mustn’t point fingers at one another saying that one is better than another. Or that one choice is better than another. Nor should the musings, ponderings and reflections of others be taken as criticisms or advocating wholesale change in one’s life. We are all doing the best we can with what we have. The people I know who are following Jesus are doing their best to follow him with their whole heart. In every person that looks different. Not everyone eschews commercialism because not every person is called to it. But not every person is called to be a finger, or a liver or a rib. We are each called to different things and different acts of contrition, faith, mercy, kindness and grace … and the world is healthier, more whole and better for it.

This is one of my very favorite movie clips of all time. I absolutely love this bit from Monty Python’s Holy Grail. It has so much texture and it’s funny to boot. It never fails to get me laughing. Never. Even though I can just about recite it from memory. But watch … then we’ll talk.

So I was reading over at Bill Kinnon’s the other day about the latest irony in Christendom. I guess Brian McLaren is decrying consumerism by asking folks to buy his books and CDs. Kinda funny, no? Not funny, haha, but funny weird as my Grampy O would say. Yeah, it’s ironic and sorta sad. But Brian is just doing his schtick. He’s gotta make money too, ya know. We all havta make money.

Someone wrote a fairly insightful comment at Bill’s and it got me thinking. Here’s the bit that sparked my brain, but you should read the rest at Bill’s place:

I question our use of a system that is biased towards marketability regardless of quality. This creates a profit oriented motive to do “ministry” and fosters the growth of dubious theology. It entices people to compromise on their values and principles to get better sales and/or increase marketability.

I question whether the growing trend towards fee-for-service ministry is appropriate because it shuts out the poor. One of the marks of the messiah that Jesus shared with the followers of John the Baptist was that the gospel is proclaimed to the poor. — Leighton Tebay

This idea is not fully fleshed out yet, so please bear with me. But my thinking is that we poor humans have absolutely no idea of what to do with an infinite God. In this capitalist age, we are less equipped than ever. In the days when faith reigned supreme we had a chance, but now in the age of reason we are handicapped, stunted and miserly in our perspectives on God and His provisions.

We start young. We begin as children, competing for the attention of our parents. Various behavioral issues are seen as efforts to compete for a limited resource (our parent’s time and attention). It continues even more voraciously in our public schools with 20 or more children in a classroom competing for the limited resources of the school system. Most obviously they compete for the time and attention of the teacher on a daily basis. Life becomes a zero-sum game. And all of us learn how to play it quite young. In places that we’d never suspect it we begin to assign winners and losers in the crevices of our minds. We understand that in an environment of limited resources, we are responsible for grabbing all that we can for ourselves. God helps those who help themselves, right? It’s in the Bible somewhere. And no one wants to be stamped with the scarlet “L” for Loser. Because losers don’t get any of those scarce resources … whatever those resources might be.

Can you hear the violence inherent that system? In such a system we must constantly be at war with one another. True love is not entirely possible, because we must also compete with each other for limited resources. Thus, even while we know that commercialism is wrong, we might tell each other of it in the same breath as asking for increased sales of our books and cds. While this makes no logical sense, it does within the context of our socio-economic system.

There is, however, a better way.  God spoke of it when He revealed himself to us in his human form.  It involves laying aside our limited ideas of wealth, self-care, and resources.  It involves relying on the infinite and becoming careless and carefree.  All of this appears silly and we will become losers in the zero-sum game of capitalism.  But for an infinite God with infinite resources, with whom we do not have to compete for His attention.

No, I have no idea what this looks like.  I’m still thinking about it.  If any of you have some ideas … please put them in the comments, I’d love to hear them.

So, after my whine yesterday, I find myself with a precious few moments this morning to write a quick post.  It’s only because I’m up early with the family as they run out to hockey practice.  After I get this out in the tubes, I’m off to put the very last (do you hear me?) coat of paint on the trim!!  And painting will be DONE!

In any case, in the midst of all the planning and preparation for Thanksgiving, my sisters-in-law and I have been multi-tasking.  We manage to do that well.  We have also been having several other conversations on the side.  One has been talk of color-coordinated family pictures to assuage my mother-in-law (a whole other story and don’t get me started).  A second has had to do with Christmas gift giving.

For several years now, my husband’s siblings and spouses have joined funds and given animals through Heifer, International.  Mostly we give goats.  For some reason this makes me inordinately happy.  Not the giving part (that makes me smile)… the goat part.

This year we have begun to discuss what changes we’d like to make to how and what we’ll give to nieces and nephews.  We’ve all agreed that our children have too much (how can I say this kindly) “stuff” and we don’t want to pass around any more “stuff” just for the sake of it.  So we’re talking about ways to reduce the “stuff” and increase the ways our children be in relationship with one another, even though they live so far away from each other (Vermont, Virginia and North Carolina).  There have been several ideas floated around … I think my favorite is the secret cousin idea.  We’re going to pick names while everyone is together over Thanksgiving.  Then at some point during the year they send a gift (but not at Christmas).  Now since the idea is to keep it a secret, they have to contact their other cousins (who’s names they didn’t draw) all during the year to muddy the waters until the reveal when they send their secret cousin gift.  There are eight cousins total, so it should be fun.  It will also be a lot of fun to see how the children play this out.

Now … for all those other gifts that need/want to be bought.  I am increasingly grumpy at the idea of just buying things.  I want to be an ethical shopper.  I found this post by Maria and this one by Cindy talking about the same things and listing places to find Christmas gifts that also make a difference in the lives of the people from whom they are purchased.  I thought I’d add my two cents … and place.  I’ve been getting this catalog for a couple of years now.  The products look lovely and are mostly made by women trying to support themselves.  It’s called Heartbeats:  Networking Women, Developing World and Minority Artists.

I’m trying to think outside the box this year.  I want my gifts to be handmade or bought from places like Heartbeats.  I think I’m just finished with commercialism.  A homemade bookmark and nice used book are perfectly good gifts, if I’ve spent time and heart on them.  Maybe I’ll make a batch of fudge for my dad … he likes fudge!  Hey … is that low fat?

It’s been in the news lately and creating quite a bit of debate over the status of churches. It was a simple request. A request from Caesar.

So, now then … how does the church respond? How do individuals respond? Are and should those responses be the same? Or, should they be different?

First, though, the request. It came from Senator Charles Grassley, the ranking Republican senator, on the Finance Committee. He wanted to know just how the untaxed money was being spent at six rather large and opulent ministries in the country. It seems like a reasonable question. It’s a question I’ve asked myself. Just what are those ministries doing with all of that money, anyway? And how much money do they have in the first place?
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It seems that some of them have purchased some rather lavish toilets ($23,000 a piece). Ministry funds have been used to purchase Rolls Royces and private jets. Sometimes they have all combined funds to give each other lavish gifts on special occasions (a fellow minister’s 40th anniversary, for example). With our faces pressed up against the crystal cathedral, it looks an awful lot like a millionaires club for Christians.

Churches enjoy a special status in this country. They pay no taxes. They are not under many of the obligations to their employees in terms of retirement plans and Social Security taxes that most companies are. They are not obligated in terms of the Employees with Disabilities Act either. In fact, because of the First Amendment, our government has adopted a largely hands off approach to churches. Now, this was, in fact, a calculated risk. It was not done because the framers were so smitten by the concept of religious liberty. Not by a long shot. They and succeeding generations took a very clear-eyed view of the good done in society by the church and considered it part of the social contract to leave churches alone; give them as much room and financial leverage as could be gained to do the work that churches did. Introducing our diverse range of Nolvadex forms! Whether you prefer tablets, capsules, or liquid solutions, we’ve got you covered. Our high-quality nolvadex tablets are convenient and easy to take, allowing you to stay on track with your treatment regimen.
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So, what work is it that churches are to do? What are we supposed to be doing in the world? To answer that question, we go to the red words; the words of Jesus. Arguably, our first priority is the first two commandments … love God and love our neighbors. Our second priority is the Great Commission. Everything else comes under these two or three things.

Jesus spent a great deal of his ministry giving us instructions about what loving our neighbor, the other, looks like. It takes some doing, but if we look at his parables and his stories and his sermons and his announcement of his ministry, and put them all together we find a beautiful mosaic of depicting how we are to love our neighbors, the others in our lives.
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The short answer is that we are to care for those who have less than we do, for those who are imprisoned and those who are ill. We are to use all of our resources on those things. Jesus said it most succinctly and pithily in this account:

The Sheep and the Goats

31-33“When he finally arrives, blazing in beauty and all his angels with him, the Son of Man will take his place on his glorious throne. Then all the nations will be arranged before him and he will sort the people out, much as a shepherd sorts out sheep and goats, putting sheep to his right and goats to his left.34-36“Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Enter, you who are blessed by my Father! Take what’s coming to you in this kingdom. It’s been ready for you since the world’s foundation. And here’s why:
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I was hungry and you fed me,
I was thirsty and you gave me a drink,
I was homeless and you gave me a room,
I was shivering and you gave me clothes,
I was sick and you stopped to visit,
I was in prison and you came to me.’

37-40“Then those ‘sheep’ are going to say, ‘Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry and feed you, thirsty and give you a drink? And when did we ever see you sick or in prison and come to you?’ Then the King will say, ‘I’m telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.’

41-43“Then he will turn to the ‘goats,’ the ones on his left, and say, ‘Get out, worthless goats! You’re good for nothing but the fires of hell. And why? Because—

I was hungry and you gave me no meal,
I was thirsty and you gave me no drink,
I was homeless and you gave me no bed,
I was shivering and you gave me no clothes,
Sick and in prison, and you never visited.’

44“Then those ‘goats’ are going to say, ‘Master, what are you talking about? When did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or homeless or shivering or sick or in prison and didn’t help?’

45“He will answer them, ‘I’m telling the solemn truth: Whenever you failed to do one of these things to someone who was being overlooked or ignored, that was me—you failed to do it to me.’

46“Then those ‘goats’ will be herded to their eternal doom, but the ‘sheep’ to their eternal reward.”

So when I read the following in this article in the Atlanta Journal Constitution about one of those six ministers who is being held to account about the excesses of his church:

Eating too much and having a nice car are neither secular sins nor spiritual crimes. But what if people around us have nothing to eat and no mobility beyond their two legs? A 2006 census of the homeless in Atlanta showed almost 5,400 people with no place to lay their heads (a situation the Gospel of Luke tells us Jesus struggled with) — and that’s just within the city limits.

I began to wonder about the separating of the sheep from the goats. I wonder about that in my own life and worry often that I am a goat. I have my own wealth to be concerned with and I am all too aware of that. I don’t lead a multi-million dollar ministry and do what I can to give food to the hungry … so I have no idea how those scales will balance out. That is probably good and keeps me striving to be better. But it all gives me a much better understanding of this formerly obscure teaching of Jesus’:

23Jesus said to his disciples, “It’s terribly hard for rich people to get into the kingdom of heaven! 24In fact, it’s easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to get into God’s kingdom.”

25When the disciples heard this, they were greatly surprised and asked, “How can anyone ever be saved?”

When push comes to shove it may be that most of us in this rich country of ours will be walking with the camels in God’s kingdom. Some of us may be spending a long time with the goats. I don’t know. But I do know that these large ministries are breaking faith with the social contract that is implied in not having to pay taxes and render unto Caesar that which is his. That alone will make it far more difficult for all of us bring water to the thirsty, food to the hungry and set the captives free. I think I will let those folks wander in the desert with their camels, searching for needles. I want to stick close to Jesus and follow his mosaic. It makes more sense to me.
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What happens when you put two taboo subjects together and discuss their relationship with each other? Find out by following the links to this month’s SynchroBlog. Money and Church is the topic. Do you think they belong together? or is it a problem when they meet? Follow the links, and watch the fur fly!

Here’s who’s in so far:

(gulp) … there … I’ve said it. I feel as though I’ve cursed in my title.

But if you want to do some justice oriented Christmas shopping on-line, I have a website to recommend. Okay, so you won’t get a tax deduction for shopping here. You won’t feel great. But they carry high quality products that are made by artists all over the world, most of whom are in developing countries. They also happen to carry one product that is very near and dear to my heart.

Jam.

Yes, jam. Well, these are called preserves. But … it’s made by my brother, LightUncle1, at his jam kitchen in Brattleboro, Vermont. It used to be made by my dad, the GrandPea. My dad perfected the recipes and now my brother makes it and many other recipes. LightHusband and he are building a website, so that all of his products can eventually be purchased on-line. But for right now, you can buy these two at Green Mountain Coffee Roasters.

Green Mountain also carries an extensive line of Fair Trade coffee and tea.  They carry artwork by local Vermont artists and artists in all of the countries from which they purchase coffee.  They deal with the artists directly, so that they are supporting those people and not a middle man (or ten).  They were among the first large coffee companies to get serious about Fair Trade and they have maintained a significant and growing commitment to it.

So … even if you don’t purchase any jam, please visit the Green Mountain Coffee Roasters website and consider making a Christmas purchase through them.  Their commitment to small Vermont and Third World businesses is impressive and long term.  Your dollars will continue that support.

Hmmm … not certain what I think about that.

This just in … my e-mail box from LightHusband:

Talking Jesus Doll Stirs Debate … yes … that’s what it is … a talking Jesus action figure. He quotes Bible verses and tells the story of the loaves and fishes. There’s a lot of concern spouted about how children will become desensitized to these … perhaps even mix and match his robes for Bratz clothing.

My concern is not so much for that, Jesus can wear any clothes the kids want and well, He’ll still just be a plastic action figure. I have a larger concern. This doll is, you got it … Made In China.

Does anyone else catch the irony? An action figure which is arguably an icon of religious freedom being manufactured in one of the least free nations on earth. By people who would be put to death if they worshipped Him. That’s beyond ironic and moving toward cruel.

I don’t even want to get into the whichever commandment … Thou shalt not make any graven images. We broke that one a long, long time ago.

I have a real problem with a Jesus doll being made by slaves, sold by a company (Wal-Mart) which condones slave like conditions in its stores … Jesus was about justice, mercy and freedom. He explicitly said in Luke 4, “I have come to set the captives free.” There is no captivity like economic slavery (read The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck sometime if you doubt me). There is no hope, no light and no freedom there; the bondage is eternal. So manufacturing and selling a Jesus action figure in that environment … well, it just makes my skin crawl.

How much is the salvation of little Western souls worth? Apparently more than the lives of Chinese men and women.

(ht to Jamie Arpin-Ricci)

Today marks the day two years ago that the levees failed.

We all continue to fail the least of those whose lives were swept away in the flood.

Life has marched on day after weary day. The press and our media hungry eyes have moved on … away from the flood zone so we no longer know about the gut wrenching poverty and hardship being lived out by thousands. But it is.

So today. Do one thing to help. Just one.

Here is a list of resources to get you started.

Check out When the Saints Go Marching In … sign the petition for Gulf Recovery Bill of 2007.

After the Headlines Fade … what we’re doing today.

Plenty International is village-based international development agency. Plenty has been sending relief supplies and volunteers to the Gulf Coast region since 2005 and will focus on rebuilding homes in 2007.

Ella Baker Center for Human Rights is a strategy and action center working for justice, opportunity and peace in urban America.

Moving Forward Gulf Coast is a community organization led by natives of the Gulf Coast region who have personally identified families who want to rebuild their lives in the Gulf Coast, but cannot because of lack of funds or information.

Oxfam America is a non-profit organization that works to end global poverty through saving lives, strengthening communities, and campaigning for change. Hurricane Katrina spurred Oxfam America to launch its first relief in the United States.

National Alliance to Restore Opportunity to the Gulf Coast & Displaced Persons is an inclusive national coalition of faith-based and social justice non-profit organizations.

Methodist Federation for Social Action unites activists within the United Methodist Church to take action on issues of justice, peace and liberation in the church, nation and world.

Mississippi ACLU is the foremost defender of the United States Constitution and the Bill of Rights. The ACLU has played a major role in nearly every critical civil liberties battle of the last century — in courtrooms, in Congress and in the public arena.

Institute on Race and Poverty investigates the ways that policies and practices disproportionately affect people of color and the disadvantaged.

Think New Orleans. Alan Guiterrez blogs about the progressive happenings including the rebuilding of infrastructure, policy happenings, and events in New Orleans.

Volunteer Match – Yahoo matches volunteers with projects and programs. Interesting facts and figures in the sidebar.

Emergency Communities – non-profit organization that employs compassion and creativity to provide community-based disaster relief. Check out their needs list for in-kind donations, or make a financial contribution. Tell a friend, spread the word, and get involved!

Mercy Corps is currently working along the Gulf Coast to help children and families recover from the devastation of Hurricanes Katrina and Rita. After an immediate response, the agency is now focusing on rebuilding the region.

Boxes for Katrina Relief Aid – If you’re looking for a way to tangibly get involved in Katrina Relief Aid work, it can all start with a simple box.

Check out this map.  Click on it and go to it’s website of origin.  Someone cooked up the fairly brilliant idea of matching the Gross Domestic Product of various nations with the gross domestic product of each state.  Now this is somewhat disingenuous because it’s difficult to split out the gdp’s of different states and you really need to control for population, etc.  BUT … it does draw our attention to how enormous the US economy is in relation to other countries.  You can read more details at the website, along with economic data that makes this map make a lot more sense.  Or … you can just sit and be stunned by the whole thing.  Which is what I did for quite some time.

We really do need to go back to kindergarten … and learn how to share our toys well with others.  Right now our report card would have an “N” on it … for Needs Improvement.  And that is unacceptable.

We had the x of y discussions with LightGirl the other morning. I’m tired.

It is the beginning of adolescence and I’m tired.

This has been a long summer of vague discontent for all of us … and we’re all tired. Something is stirring. We’re struggling to rewrite familial roles in light of having this half-woman in our midst. Our various ailments have not helped this process.

We’ve been cleaning quite a bit too. As I’ve been recuperating I find I can’t stand the house any. longer. So … we’ve been cleaning. In part this was precipitated by a pass through the livingroom in which I chanced to spy crumpled underwear on the sofa. That was

the.

last.

straw.

One should never find crumpled underwear on the livingroom sofa. Well … the good news is – it wasn’t underwear. It was a crumpled teddy bear hockey sweater (in hockey they are called sweaters, not jerseys). Still … the shock factor combined with the recuperation factor got me going. So.

LightGirl has found all sorts buried treasure in her room. Her brand new hockey stick bag. Her old cellphone recharger (she thought this was left in a hotel room during a tournament in March). Every hour brings something new. Christmas in August. LightBoy is experiencing much the same joie d’vivre.

Then LightGirl and I looked under my bed. Now this is actually a fairly regular occurrence because it is where we store wrapping paper. But this time we really looked. And found her old Barbie carrying case.

That is somewhat similar to the case that LightGirl had (notice the past tense). We pulled it out from it’s “storage facility,” she looked inside and relived some of her Barbie memories. Then she very abruptly said, “I’m throwing this away. I don’t play with Barbies anymore and there’s no reason to keep this.” I had to agree with her. And I was very sad. But in that moment I appreciated my father.

When I was little and playing with Barbies I too wanted a Barbie carrying case. I wanted one just like all the other little girls. One made of (basically) vinyl covered cardboard with a snap lock and handle. They looked like this:

I’m not certain what inspired my father. I don’t know if it was finances. Or if it was that he likes working with his hands and wood. Or if he just couldn’t bear to spend money on cheap vinyl-covered cardboard. There are some things my father doesn’t talk about, so I’m not certain of his inspiration. But he made a Barbie carry-case for me when I was about 6 or 7. I don’t remember when I received it. Honestly, it’s been around so long now, I almost don’t remember a time when I didn’t have it. But here’s the terrible thing. When he first made it for me, I hated it. I didn’t want some handmade blue and white wooden box, with lovely brass fixtures. I wanted cheap vinyl-covered cardboard … sleek and shiny (and light weight) with pretty shiny colors, and Barbie’s picture on it. Just like all my friends had. My friends had beautiful, cool carry cases and they often got new ones here and there along the way. I just had my same old blue and white work horse.

I still have my same old blue and white work horse. It doesn’t carry Barbie treasures anymore. Now it carries my mementos from a life well lived. It also carries something else. Something more ephemeral. It carries the love my father has for me. It speaks to me in ways that my father sometimes can’t. My dad has many words for many different things, but for things of deep emotion he keeps hidden away. So I must search those out and find them in a blue and white box hand-made for me some 40 years ago.

I was thinking about that blue and white work horse when I read this article about girls in India. This article made me very sad. The intersecting curves of progress and tradition are making the lives of girls very tenuous in India. The female infanticide rate is highest in the wealthiest districts. I wondered about the fathers there who are reducing their paternity to a financial bottom line and missing out on the opportunity to build a lifetime with a daughter. I understand that the cultural mores are very different in India, but father and daughterhood are universal familial ties. What is the impact of reducing familial ties to a financial bottom line? How will those thousands of individual decisions ultimately effect/affect Indian culture? No one knows at the moment. But when I think of the inestimable value of a human life and how we assure our children of this each day in the thousand small and large bits of time and conversation, I think that the children of India are learning to evaluate life based on only one facet of human interaction. I wonder how this will play itself out. How will these cultures who have progressed so quickly on one face handle the change? How will the rest of us handle it as well?