Vermont Vignette
Jan 24th, 2008 by Sonja

Because I needed a good giggle … here’s a look at how I grew up. At least two of my readers will get these, the rest of you will wonder how I’m still sane, or perhaps begin to understand my lack thereof. For the record, I have direct, personal experience with all of the below … yes, all of them.

Subject: a Vermont check…

Forget Rednecks ….

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about Vermonters……

–If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you live in Vermont.

–If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance and they don’t work there, you live in Vermont.

–If you’ve worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in Vermont.

–If you’ve had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in Vermont.

–If you measure distance in hours, you live in Vermont.

–If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you live in Vermont.

–If you have switched from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day and back again, you live in Vermont. (note – this would mean “in the car” because no one has a/c in the house)

–If you can drive 75 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching, you live in Vermont.

–If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you live in Vermont.

–If you carry jumpers in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you live in Vermont.

–If you design your kid’s Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit, you live in Vermont.

–If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph — you’re going 80 and everybody is passing you, you live in Vermont .

–If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you live in Vermont. (my personal favorite)

–If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, mud season and road construction season, you live in Vermont.

–If you have more miles on your snow blower than your car, you live in Vermont.

–If you find 10 degrees “a little chilly”, you live in Vermont.

–If you actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your Vermont friends & others, you live in Vermont …

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