When I was in high school it was a huge big deal to gather friends and go to Burlington for the day. I lived in a tiny town in central Vermont. There were about 4 stores in the local larger town, so going to Burlington represented shopping, eating and metropolitan nirvana for us backwoods hayseeds. Once one or two of us reached driving age, and had parents who would release an automobile into our possession, we were free.
I had my first experience of ordering Chinese food on my own and using chop sticks in Burlington. We’d wander up and down Church Street together. Church Street has since been blocked to auto traffic and is an open air mall. Back then, it was an ordinary street filled with adventure for teenagers in from the back country. Some distance away from Church Street, a new experience opened up in the later years. Two funny guys from New York City bought an old gas station and turned it into an ice cream store. Man. They made the best ice cream anywhere. And it should have been … it was made with real ingredients. Whole milk, whole cream. Real fruit. Dark chocolate. Ice cream to die for.
But … ice cream in a gas station? Who would buy it, the old-timers in the state ridiculed the idea. And the lines in the summer were around the block.
Pretty soon, the ice cream was being cartoned and sold in small containers throughout the state. But one could only get it in Vermont. There were now also a couple of other scoop shops … I forget where the earlier ones were placed. But I know that I had my first anniversary dinner in one ten years later. I had a hot fudge sundae in a waffle cone and LightHusband went next door for a slice of pizza. We sat outside on a swing to eat.
You know the name of the company; it’s become ubiquitous with ice cream now. Ben & Jerry’s. Their pints stock freezers nation-wide. For all I know, you can get them in Canada too. The company sold out to Hershey or Nestle or some large conglomerate several years back and the ice cream isn’t nearly as good anymore. What was once innovative is now just silliness and twaddle. One might say they jumped the shark.
If you asked me what the most innovative thing about Ben & Jerrys was, the answer might surprise you. For their ice cream was divine. They were locovores before it became trendy or even had a name, using only small family dairies for their milk, cream and eggs. No, the most innovative thing about Ben & Jerrys was this … their executive compensation structure.
I remember reading in Inc. Magazine back in the late 1980’s that they had structured the company in such a way so that neither Ben nor Jerry were compensated greater than 7 times the salary of the lowest paid employee of the company. Think about that. No matter how much Ben or Jerry made, it could never be greater than 7 times the salary of the lowest paid person in the company.
This has been on my mind recently as I read about the financial crisis on Wall Street and in Detroit. I read about the “necessity” of golden parachutes in the tens of millions of dollars and executive compensation packages that look like lottery ticket loot. There are some companies which have made an attempt to restrain executive compensation. Whole Foods limits compensation of its executives to lowest employees in the ratio of 19:1 according to this Fast Company article written in Feb. 2007. It’s the reprint of a letter written from CEO, John Mackay to his leadership team in which he raises the compensation ratio from 14:1 to 19:1 and reduces his salary to $1.00. Apparently, what is left out of all company press is that Mr. Mackay also has an impressive stock option from Whole Foods. Of course. Cynics point to this as evidence of malfeasance. Make of it what you will. He’s still only taking $1 in salary and donating the rest to charity. He’s a rarity in the business world.
I have to wonder though. In yet another grocery store albeit tiny, independent and Mennonite, I saw this on the wall last spring: “The cost of something is that amount of life which must be exchanged for it.” I’ve been meditating on that for months now. Especially in light of our nation’s current financial woes.
The cost of something is that amount of life which must be exchanged for it.
What will our greed cost us? What amount of our lives will we be exchanging in order to pay for these few at the top?
When we begin to understand that we, or rather our representatives in Congress, have done that for us, then perhaps we will begin to actually change things.
Or maybe two or three.
I made a decision last year sometime. I don’t remember when it was. But I remembered it this year and I had time to make good on it. The decision was that I would make our Christmas gifts for extended family members. I think the decision began sometime around “Make Something Day,” but by then it was too late for me. Especially since I had 35 people in my house that day. And it took me … uh … weeks to recuperate.
This year is different. We’re not having a big, ornate Thanksgiving. The day after LightHusband is taking the LightKids to go play paintball with one of his compatriots at work. Most importantly, we are not painting the house all autumn. On the other hand … this means that the house is all wrecky. And making me slightly insane.
So I have spent the last several days pouring through tutorial websites, blogs and magazines finding cool things to make for my nieces, nephews, siblings, in-laws, out-laws, etc. There was a condition though. I had to have most, if not all, of the materials on hand for the project. And it has to be fairly simple. In other words, these gifts have to be made out of stuff I already have and not take too much time or energy. There will be a few things I have to purchase (like some plastic mesh to make a fabric garage & doll house). But for the most part, I will be able to make these gifts with stuff I already have.
Then I spent an inordinate amount of time organizing myself. Making lists of what I would make and in what order. I’m using Evernote to keep track of all the websites and people/gift recipients, and I’m using Things to keep track of the when and how. If you’re also interested in making your gifts this year, start with Sew Mama Sew. It’s a group blog and they’re doing gift tutorials every day this month that link to other blogs, which (of course, branch out to others. For even more inspiration, they did this last year, so if you click on “November 2007” you get even more ideas. Everyday they have gift ideas centered on a particular theme (such as teachers, or books or cold weather) with tutorials, gifts to buy that are handmade, patterns to buy and then homemade food recipes (like homemade marshmallows! yum!).
Mission number two involves the hockey team (what else?). We’re traveling out of state about 12 days before Christmas to play a couple of games. This involves a hotel stay. I usually organize some activity while we’re in the hotel to prevent large groups of young women from roaming the corridors in the evening teeheeing and making too much noise for the other guests. The girls don’t seem to understand that no one else wants to hear them. So for this trip I’m organizing dinner out and then a Christmas party back at the hotel. I thought it would be a good idea (based on some discussions last year) if the Christmas party were to involve some sort of charitable activity/donation to a local shelter. So I have to call them this morning and find out what we might be able to do for them in that situation. That’s just an extra wrinkle in my planning/organizing. I’ve found a bunch of fun games for the tween/teen set that can be played in a hotel setting. We’ll be having fun.
Mission number three is to return to my old tradition of making plum pudding this year. I use my Welsh great, great grandmother’s recipe handed down to me by my grandmother. I dropped it for a couple of years because I was having such a difficult time finding suet, among other things. But I think I can find it again this year. So I’ll be making my plum puddings in a couple of weeks. Ready to go for Christmas dinner. YUM!!
UPDATE: Eureka! I found the suet at a small local butcher shop about 7 miles out of town. When giving directions, the man told it was next to some antique shops and he said, “But you have to spend more here than on antiques,” in a gravelly southern accent. I cheerfully assured him I’d rather have some good beef than an antique (never mentioning that this close to DC they’re likely to be overpriced junk in any case). I’m going to pick it up this afternoon. And dig out my grandmother’s recipe to get the rest of the ingredients this weekend.
In all, though, my missions seem to be taking me away from the computer. In addition, I’m trying to do more reading and I have some quilts that are slowly being pieced as well. So if you don’t see me very much around here, don’t worry. I’m still here. Just trying to be faithful to my missions and get them accomplished. You’ll prob’ly see more of me in the New Year. As I stay off the roads while LightGirl learns to drive!!!
So …
Where were you when?
Where were you when John Glenn Neil Armstrong (thanks BroKen) walked on the moon?
Where were you when …
… the first man of African-American descent was elected president?
I’m going to remember every step of this process. I’m going to relish it.
Sometime last weekend it was announced that the final rally of Obama’s campaign would be literally in my backyard. In my hometown. Less than two miles from my house, on Monday evening. So CoachWonderWoman and her daughter, LightGirl and I all walked to the appointed place. We stood around watching the people and wondering for about three hours. There was an amazing cross-section of people at the rally. There were young and old, of every ethnic background and all walks of life. We could have been in an airport, or on a street corner, or in a bus station. There was everyone there. Everyone. (And some bad music. I don’t know who was in charge of the live music, but it was horrid. Think Bill Murray Lounge Lizard. Ugh. They played “Celebrate” by Kool & The Gang and I thought I was in the world’s largest elevator. And I discovered that I can hear “Beautiful Day” too many times in one evening – five, for the record) It was a typical political rally and hearing Obama speak was wonderful. I’m glad we saw him (microscopically) in person. I’m glad we had the experience of being amongst fellow supporters and seeing what that was like … that was more important to me. Apparently, there were about 80,000 of us packed into that field. I still can’t quite get my head around that.
Yesterday I walked to my polling place alone. Both children were otherwise engaged and LightHusband had a meeting. He was going to vote later. My polling place just so happens to be in a middle school which was once the place of worship for a church I used to go to (my CLB1). Usually the voting room is in the chorus room in the back. But yesterday in anticipation of long lines and increased voter turnout, they had moved the voting to the cafeteria. This happened to be the very place where we used to worship. I didn’t really take note of this until after I’d left.
I went to where my last name lined up with the letters and waited my turn … less than a minute. I noticed a table off to the left groaning with snack food for poll workers. Then it was my turn and I handed my voter registration card to the people at the table, they asked me for my identifying information, assigned me number 243 and I went to await a booth. I got to the booth and was overwhelmed with exuberance. I don’t know. I just got happy. Everytime I hit a button on the touch screen I had to do a tiny jig. Well, this was a little bit too much for the tiny little African-American lady who was attending my booth. I think she was worried I was going to knock it over or something. She was smiling at me, yet nervous. When I was done and she handed me my sticker, she also gave me a big hug. Then I promptly tried to walk out the wrong doors! and everyone hollered, “Ma’m you’re going the wrong way!!” oops.
What a ninny. So I turned around with a big grin on and all the poll workers were smiling at me. So I waved and shrugged and went the right direction. And told them I had the blonde streaks applied for a reason!!
Then I came home and giggled the whole way. I wore my sticker with pride. For the first time since my first time voting (1980), I’ve been excited about a candidate. I’m inspired. I’m inspired because Obama gets scripture; he quotes it regularly and not just the easy, well-known stuff … he quoted from Amos last night. And I’m inspired because he gets the “social contract” in a way that many of our latter-day leaders have not … to whit:
His triumph was decisive and sweeping, because he saw what is wrong with this country: the utter failure of government to protect its citizens. He offered a government that does not try to solve every problem but will do those things beyond the power of individual citizens: to regulate the economy fairly, keep the air clean and the food safe, ensure that the sick have access to health care, and educate children to compete in a globalized world. (italics mine for emphasis) From today’s NYTimes editorial
In other words, there are things that are the responsibility of the government and things that are the responsibility of us as individuals. Give us the empowerment to do our thing and then do the stuff that is the responsibility of the government. Give us the the space to do things locally in our communities to bring about change where ever we are and in the things that impassion us. And, well … that is the way to truly change history.
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I just voted. Yes, I voted for the hip, young man of color for President. I have many reasons why and I’ll get to them in a second. But first a wee story or two.
It was exciting to go and vote this time. In fact, I scared my poor poll worker, I was so exuberant at the little screen. Then when she handed me my sticker, she hugged me. As I attempted to dance through the wrong doors in exit, all the poll workers called to me and I turned around abashed at my silliness. I was just too giddy. Why was I giddy? Here’s why. Extended-Release Tablets: Seek long-lasting anxiety control? Klonopin’s extended-release tablets slowly release medication over time, providing sustained benefits throughout the day. Choose the klonopin form that suits your needs best and take a step towards managing your anxiety effectively. Remember to consult with your healthcare professional to find the right option for you.
I remember the 1960’s. Most of all, I remember Martin Luther King, Jr. If I had to pick a hero, he’d be it. He was a legend in his own time. I might pick Gandhi, but for a real American hero, I’d pick King. Every year I listen to his “I Have A Dream” speech and cry. I’ve studied his speeches and writings; I have a fairly good idea of which Biblical prophets he was studying when he wrote. And today … well, today … I got to vote for someone based upon the content of his character not the color of his skin. Amen and hallelujah. And the tiny little poll worker who hugged me? Well, she was African-American too. Experience tranquility like never before with our innovative collection of xanax Forms. From fast-acting tablets to convenient extended-release capsules, we have the perfect solution tailored to your needs.
Mind you, I did NOT vote for Obama because of his roots either. Did I listen to both sides? No, not equally. I lost respect for the Republican party back in 2000 and again when Republicans treated James Jeffords with such disrespect when he became an independent. The party had huge barriers to overcome in my mind, and they failed to get there. Experience the ultimate productivity boost and heightened focus with our range of modafinil forms. Whether you prefer tablets, capsules, or even a convenient sublingual option, we’ve got you covered! ?
Here is why I voted for Obama …
“People are more inclined to be drawn in if their leader has a compelling vision. Great leaders help people get in touch with their own aspirations and then will help them forge those aspirations into a personal vision.” John Kotter
I didn’t find that quote until about a week ago when I was looking for something else entirely. But it encapsulates my reasons for choosing Obama for president. Even my father has some qualms about the details of his platform, the hows and wherefors. What exactly will he do if he is elected? For someone with little time in his role in the Senate those are very legitimate questions. But it’s his ability to inspire that I look at. Take charge of your data collection process and make informed decisions with ambien Forms!
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Frankly, I’m tired of leaders who go around poking into private business looking for what is wrong. I want leaders who will inspire us to find our dreams and make them reality. It is in those dreams and that reality that we will rebuild our economy, our infrastructure, get us off the dependence on petroleum and many of the other ills that we currently find ourselves in. That sort of leadership is transformational; it begins at the top and trickles down. We learn how to encourage and develop our own dreams. Then we learn how to encourage and develop the dreams of others.
Or will it? Can a charismatic leader help us overcome our addiction to power? That’s the question for the ages. Too often people in leadership are at the top, they lead from above and are in a position of power. They have the ability to cause hardship, pain and devastation to those they purport to lead. Typically, those who are leading hold all or most of the cards. But in this new scenario, of dream empowerment, the little guy, the individual is given the space to dream and realize those dreams.
So, will we find this in Obama? I don’t know. I hope so. But that’s what I voted for; that’s what I’m hoping for. That’s the kind of leadership I’m hoping for. In this age of choleric leadership, we need something new. We need something that won’t revolt us and turn our stomachs. Something, someone nationally, and locally who will help us find our own dreams and turn them into reality.
****************************************************************
This is part of synchroblog on Leadership … the rest of the most excellent writings are below, please check them out:
Jonathan Brink – Letter To The President
Adam Gonnerman – Aspiring to the Episcopate
Kai – Leadership – Is Servant Leadership a Broken Model?
Sally Coleman – In the world but not of it- servant leadership for the 21st Century Church
Alan Knox – Submission is given not taken
Joe Miller – Elders Lead a Healthy Family: The Future
Cobus van Wyngaard – Empowering leadership
Steve Hayes – Servant leadership
Geoff Matheson – Leadership
John Smulo – Australian Leadership Lessons
Helen Mildenhall – Leadership
Tyler Savage – Moral Leadership – Is it what we need?
Bryan Riley – Leading is to Listen and Obey
Susan Barnes – Give someone else a turn!
Liz Dyer – A Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Polls…
Lionel Woods – Why Diverse Leadership is Good for America
Julie Clawson – Leadership Expectations
Ellen Haroutunian – A New Kind Of Leadership
Matt Stone – Converting Leadership
Steve Bradley – Lording or Leading?
Adam Myers – Two types of Leadership
Bethany Stedman – A Leadership Mosaic
Kathy Escobar – I’m Pretty Sure This Book Won’t Make It On The Bestseller List
Fuzzy Orthodoxy – Self Leadership
Sonja Andrews – Leadership In An Age of Cholera
Tara Hull – Leadership & Being A Single Mom
This subject has become extremely volatile lately. It’s been bandied about in classrooms, blogs, pubs, buses … everywhere (in fact) that two or more are gathered. Just the other day, a good friend of mine and I were catching up on the phone and she exasperatedly said, “Well, I’m voting pro-life, and that’s that.” She quickly moved to another topic, and left me to wonder, “what does that even mean any more?” I’m not sure I know what “pro-choice” means either, for that matter. So I’ve been doing a lot of sewing and thinking.
Scot McKnight put up a question about the issue of abortion and pro-life vs. pro-choice at Jesus Creed one day a couple of weeks ago. I don’t often comment in a thread there and I have not started a conversation based upon one of his since the early days of my blog. But this one is personal. I’ve spent a long time thinking this one through, for a number of reasons. Not the least of which is that LightGirl now reads my blog and I wanted to have the chance to talk to her before I posted this.
I’ve seen Obama referred to more than one place as a “pro-abortion zealot” and in other places as simply “pro-abortion.” I’ve seen other folks say that they cannot possibly vote for a president who is not pro-life, or who will “kill the innocent.” And I’m genuinely confused by the rhetoric. You see, I have something in common with candidate that gives me a unique perspective on this subject. Both of us are the products of a marriage brought about by our mothers’ pregnancies with us. His parents’ marriage ended in divorce, my parents are still married.
When you know that your mother got married because she was pregnant with you, it challenges any settled conclusion you think you might come to on the issue of abortion. Every time you get to one place or another, you remember your mom and her particular set of circumstances. What if …
Among many things, it decidedly does not make one a “pro-abortion zealot.” I cannot speak for the candidate personally because I do not know him. I can, however, speak for myself. I know that I see the issue as incredibly nuanced and far more filled with shades of gray than with the black or white that most true zealots would like us to believe. In my heart of hearts I have occasionally wondered what might have happened to me, had abortion been legally available to my mother when she discovered her pregnancy in the fall of 1960. But as she is fond of saying to me, “Stop playing the what if game.” 😉 It was not available, and now I’m here … for better or worse (my words, never my mother’s).
This argument, this issue has become incredibly divisive and words have become bombs that are thrown at one another. Witness the exchange between the candidates during the last presidential debate. As Senator Obama reminded us, “no one is pro-abortion.” Even those who are the most ardent supporters of “pro-choice” secretly hope they never have to take advantage of that choice. I would hope that we can all at least agree on that.
I’ve lived on both sides in this war. I marched in one of the largest pro-choice rallies in Washington back in 1989 and carried an ancient “Don’t Tread On Me” flag. My mother, husband and several cousins walked too. I’ve been pro-life as a member of an evangelical church for fourteen years … and written letters to politicians, etc. I’ve supported our local Crisis Pregnancy Center with donations and prayers. But after all of it … I think they’re all wrong.
I want to begin with a reveal of sorts. I have had an abortion.
I could tell you it was the lowest point in my life and I’d been raped or something horrible like that. But it would be a lie. I was engaged to LightHusband and the baby was due about a month after our scheduled wedding. The truth is, I had terrible anger issues at the time. We had no money. There was no money for child care and no money for me to stop working. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that if I had a baby then I was certain to abuse the child. I was terrified. Horrified. Guilty if I did and guilty if I didn’t.
That all sounds weak and thready now. But at the time, we (LightHusband and I) were in a deep hole with no way out, no one to talk to and nowhere to go. As ridiculous as it sounds, out of wedlock pregnancy is still a stigma in our culture. It is a gross and abject failure of huge proportions for women on so many levels that one cannot bear to acknowledge it.
Many of my friends (regardless of their faith) have had abortions. Others have given up babies for adoption. Some have had the horrible fate to have done both (some as the result of unmarried sex, others as the result of rape or incest). All have gone on to raise families.
My oldest cousin is a woman now in her sixties. When she was in her thirties, she was a director of a Planned Parenthood clinic in her town. She had two daughters about my age (early teens at the time) and found herself pregnant with an unplanned pregnancy. It was the source of many uproarious jokes in my family and still is. However, she went on to have that baby, who is now a wonderful woman in her own right.
My point in all of this is that when we engage in the abortion debate, we forget that it’s not about theology, or exegesis or theory … it’s about individual women and men, as well as the babies that everyone wants to hang their hat on. Individual women (and men) who, in a very dark hour, are making a Hobbes choice. There is rarely a good outcome; only frightening and intolerable. Abortion and adoption have long running ramifications that leave scars. Getting married and raising the baby at a young age is a risky choice that only rarely works out well (my parents are a rare exception to that rule). And we all know how well unwed motherhood works. We can wave the Bible around all we want, but until we’re ready to show individual women that they indeed have another way out, it’s all just so much hot air. Or as Paul might have said, a clanging gong.
I’ve changed as the years have gone by. There is too much at stake to use a hatchet, when a scalpel is called for. Or perhaps analogies of cutting implements are insensitive in this instance. Perhaps when all is said and done, we should not be putting our hope in the law. I’ve often thought (as have others much smarter than I) that the law cannot change hearts. Sure, say those of a more conservative bent, but it draws boundaries around behavior. Yep, I agree. However, I began think about about a deeper law and a deeper magic. I began to think about it in terms like this: Jesus said things like “I have come to fulfill the Law.” and “Perfect love drives out fear.”
Before He came, the Jewish law was convoluted and nearly impossible to fill perfectly. Our way to the Father was blocked at almost every turn by jots and tittles. So He sent His Son to fill them all. To make the way straight and give us a way in. His perfect love would straighten things out and we would not have to be afraid anymore of not knowing. And this morning ASBO Jesus posted this which perfectly demonstrates, for me, this issue:
The whole issue is complex, complicated and far too delicate to be left to lawyers and politicians. Nor is it something that can be abolished with laws. Unplanned pregnancies within and without marriage are part of the imperfectness of this world that we live in. We cannot make them stop happening by virtue of changing laws, but our response to them can change through one avenue … love. We can only respond to each of them within the context of an individual relationship. Going after them with the hatchet of the law can only breed contempt, fear and anger. For the life of me, I can’t find those in the Gospel of Jesus. So … mark me, pro-human and pro-relationship. I’ll leave the debate to the zealots.